 |
| Paul Reynolds. "Kitten and partial reflection in mirror". 5-13-06 via Wikipedia. CC A 2.0. |
The audience is the group of people that agree that the gender gap is a problem but haven't necessarily started taking action in an attempt to deal with it. The purpose of the piece is to outline for my audience the steps they can take to effectively deal with the gender gap and start helping women achieve more in hour society without being held back based on gender biases. I think it was fairly successful in conveying that purpose and reaching that audience; however, I feel like I'm having a hard time accepting the fact that they already know the gender gap is a big deal.
Why are you revising this paper?
I'm revising this paper because it needs to be better. I also need to figure out what I want to say, because if I can't stop talking about why the gender gap is a big deal for the majority of my paper, I might as well make that my purpose and speak to a different audience.
Whom are you revising for? Get solid answer to the Questions of Audience Awareness
I'm revising for my readers, I think that if they're going to get the most out of my paper I need to be able to tailor it to them specifically. Right now I'm not doing a great job with that, so I'll either need to change the paper or change the audience. I'm not sure which one of those I want to do yet, but I'm feeling like it'll end up being the audience because I can't help but talk about why the gender gap is a big deal, I think I'm just really passionate about informing people about it.
How will the following aspects of your paper change?
Length
If I am discussing why the gap is a big deal, my paper might get longer because there have been numerous studies done about the gap but at the same time, I might try to shorten it because if I'm attempting to convince my audience that the gender gap is a real issue, I don't want to make them take too much time reading my piece because they might get bored and stop (or never start).
Format
Right now it's in a paper format and I feel like it'll stay that way, although shorter and more concise might be the way to go.
Appearance
I want to make sure it doesn't look too daunting. I think I'll try to accomplish that by breaking it up into many smaller paragraphs to that each one is bite size and easy to digest.
Use of Evidence
I'll definitely be using a lot more evidence when trying to convince them that the gender gap is a real problem because there have been so many documented effects and trends. However, it has to be a tasteful amount because I definitely don't want my readers to get bored or even overwhelmed by all the numbers that I'm throwing at them.
Introduction and Conclusion
The introduction should be friendly and interesting, and the conclusion should be serious and bring a sense of urgency. I want the intro to make my readers feel comfortable with wherever they stand on the issue as the enter the piece, but by the end hopefully they'll be on my side and the conclusion will bring home the idea that it's serious and that something needs to be done as soon as possible.
Structure of your Argument
I haven't figured out the structure of the new argument or how it will change. I think I'll start by introducing a little bit of the history of the gender gap, and then I'll start talking more about how things have changed over the years for different groups and how much better society is because of it. Then once I've created that need for equality and demonstrated, with facts, how women are still being oppressed, I'll highlight a number of things that would improve very quickly if we'd all agree to make this a priority.
Depth of your Argument
I don't want to go too in depth because this isn't supposed to be a research paper but a persuasive one. It's almost like a QRG in that my readers don't need to finish the piece and have a complete understanding of everything about the gender gap, but they do need to recognize that it's a problem and know a little bit about why it matters.
No comments:
Post a Comment